Wednesday 25 August 2010

Bad shoes and general confusion

Phew! What a couple of weeks! And the 2 main themes for these weeks are bad bad shoes and big confusion. Might as well go in some kind of order so first up it's the shoes. Perhaps it's because I've been lusting after the pair that I blogged about a couple of weeks ago. Or maybe it's because 2 more pairs of my much loved, well battered shoes have had to go the way of the shoe graveyard. Maybe I should just say it like it is and admit that I spend a lot of time looking at shoes, be they on people's feet, on the interwebby, or in pretty shoe shops. The alarming trend that I have noticed though is one for bad shoes. Actually bad doesn't cover it. Butt ugly is how I sum up most of the pairs. Seriously shoe wearing people, what are you doing?

For those that are not sure, in Dizz World, butt ugly shoes basically means any of the following:
  • plain old boring black shoes
  • plain old boring black shoes that have clumpy soles/heels
  • shoes that fasten with velcro (are we 5?!)
  • clumpy shoes that are clearly too heavy for your way too skinny legs so get some feckin' decent shoes that you can lift up and/or eat some pies whilst you're at it
  • hooker shoes (they might be pretty colours and bling but you look like you belong on the streets)
  • any shoe or boot (especially boot!) that is baby pink. These really only belong on babies and even then, questionable, what's wrong with a dash of red or funky purple for the wee babes?

There's probably a million more but that's all I can think of for now. The butt ugly shoes that disturb me the most are worn by women in power. You ladies earn lots of money, you really should be wearing lovely lovely shoes. Personally, if I am ever a woman in power and earning lots of those pretty pennies I will look so fabulous that people won't care if I'm crap at managing or whatever, they'll just be overwhelmed by my fabulous wardrobe. And jelly of my shoes. Probably Christian Laboutins with the oh so pretty red sole and fierce 6 inch heels...and my Jimmy Choos...and my Manolos...what was that? Pension? Pah! Pretty shoes are so much more desirable than thinking about being old! So look out, if I'm frowning whilst looking at your feet you'll know that the phrase butt ugly is being thought.

And so to the confusion. The major confusion came from watching Inception. I'd been looking forward to it sooooo much. But it didn't live up to my expectations. This is mainly because I (still!) don't have a clue what actually happened! It was so confusing. And whizzy. And dizzy-fying, very hard to watch with my poor Dizz ears. A lot of it was me kind of slammed back up against the seat praying for the motion to stop. Wavey and I kept leaning over and saying, do you know what's going on? No. Do you? And so on until the end. When we still didn't understand. I tried looking up what it all meant on the web but there were so many theories out there that I started to get confused by them too! So I give up. If anyone wants to explain, please do. My overwhelming thought the whole time I was watching was: that Marion Cotillard, she's got lovely hair she has...

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